Nodding your head in agreement with what you read will not solve your home problems. A good marriage comes partly as the result of diligent effort. It has to be based on God’s laws -- learned and obeyed. Parents need to be submitted to what the will of God is for them. With great humility and submission, Christ went to the cross (Philippians 2:5-6). Husbands and wives must let go of themselves and submit first to God and then to each other. Mutual submission first comes from becoming a Christian and then developing the “mind of Christ” by the Holy Spirit using the Word of God in our lives.
Many homes are having troubles due to a multitude of reasons. (1). First, some men have failed to shoulder their responsibility as the head of the home. Instead, in many cases, we have spineless jellyfish instead of loving, strong, authoritative men. God’s Word teaches that men have a responsibility to be the head of the home. Paul, writing to deacons, offered a truth for all men. “A deacon must be faithful to his wife, and he must manage his children and household well.” A pastor “must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him. For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church?” (I Tim. 3:4-5) (LASB). This is a standard of excellence for all husbands.
(2). Secondly, many husbands will honestly admit that they fail to diligently, faithfully, and lovingly treat their wives as Christ does His Church (Eph. 5:28). No woman in her right mind will refuse a man’s love that is patterned after the love of Christ. A husband and wife are to have esteem for each other, to consider one another’s welfare above their own, stay by one another’s side through the highs and lows and ups and downs of life.
(3). Thirdly, not enough exemplary teaching is being done in our homes and in our churches. We have forsaken God’s Word. Why aren’t our churches producing more husbands that are patient, understanding, kind, and loving to their wives and children -- as is patterned by Christ’s love for the Church? Most of us consider Christ as loving, forgiving, merciful, and understanding, but we fail to model and teach our children that Christ is the Boss (authority) over our lives. Some men are teaching their family that Sunday Evening Worship and the Wednesday night Prayer and Bible Study aren’t important. The way you treat the church is the way you treat Christ. Please don’t ignore your spiritual responsibilities to God and allow the souls of your children go to Hell.
Authority must begin at home with the husband who has first yielded himself to the Lordship of Christ. Unfortunately, many of our young men and women are never trained by the church in Biblical ways of parenting before getting into a marriage relationship. The older women of Crete were told by the Apostle Paul to be exemplary women of God while teaching the younger women to “love their husbands and their children” (Titus 2:4) At the same time, young men were to be encouraged to live wisely (v. 5). Values are passed on in a Bible-teaching home and church. It is difficult for a woman to honor, revere, and be humble and submissive to a man who curses, drinks heavily, and abuses her and the kids. Men, how long has it been since you made a strong effort to really get to know your children and the friends of your children, or spend some time helping in their homework, or talking with them about their hopes and dreams? I like to think of a dad as being the major dream-maker in a home. Most of all, by your words and example, do you teach spiritual truths to your children? You are appointed by God to be the spiritual priest in your home.
In conclusion, all husbands and wives ought to get Biblical. Look for ways to apply Scripture truth, such as I Corinthians 13. Here are a few verses to consider: Love is not proud but admits that the wife may be right about what’s wrong with the car. Love is not self-seeking, but a loving husband takes his wife shopping on a Saturday morning and PATIENTLY follows her from store to store. (When I shop with my wife, I have to pray for patience. I try to get involved. I tell her, “I believe this dress would look pretty on you!”) Love rejoices with the truth by facing reality and changing accordingly without argument. Ladies, love is not easily angered and doesn’t even raise its voice when your husband does. Gentlemen, don’t forget that love is kind and washes the dishes without grumbling when your wife has had a bad day. Love always hopes, holding to the shared dreams. Love always perseveres, growing even stronger in adversity, stress, and heartaches.
Join with the Kaplan Baptist Church family in worship at the following times: Sunday School (9:30a.m.); Sunday Morning Worship (10:30 a.m.); Sunday Evening Worship (5:00 p.m.); Wednesday Prayer and Bible Study (6:30 p.m.). We are doing Bible studies on the book of Revelation on Wednesday nights.